He doesn´t deserve me.
"He doesn´t deserve you!"
"I know that that's what everyone's been telling me for months, and i´ve known it was true. but now i feel it. i feel it in my heart that i am too good for him. he wasn't any good for me. he hurt me, he rejected me, he made the corners of my soul cave in. he made me happy for such a short time, and even then it was full of ups and downs. and i deserve better than that. i deserve a boy that loves me, that truly knows me fully and completely and is in love with every bit of me. i deserve a guy that always wants to be with me and will do anything for me. i deserve a man who makes me happy.
and i believe he exists. i believe now that someday, i will find my perfect match. i haven't been optimistic in months. i've spent so much time alone, dwelling on him, on the one that broke my heart. and i haven't been able to see that this isn't the end. i'm young, i have the rest of my life ahead of me. one day, i will find that person and we will fall crazily and madly in love. he exists. and it's okay if i don't find him anytime soon. i'm not going to go out there and search for him. because you know what? i do believe in soulmates. i believe that everyone has someone made just for them. and today, today i felt that hope inside of me. that i will find my soulmate. and this guy, this stupid guy that broke me is not him. so why am i wasting my life crying over him? from now on, i'm just going to let go. i know i won't completely get over him right away, but i'm not going to spend any more time sitting at home when i could be living my life. i'm letting go of him because i don't need him.
i'm going to live. i'm going to have a love for life. and i'm going to be happy."
Jag kan bara säga WORD på den här texten. Den är så rysligt sann och jag känner igen mig så fruktansvärt mycket. Skrämmande. Jag tror även att det finns andra som känner igen sig i denna berättelse. Kanske inte hela, men delvis.
Nu rycker vi oss i kragen och inser att killar inte är livet, okej? Nu lever vi för våra fina vänner, för stunderna då vi känner oss som snyggast och bäst. För dagarna då allt går som en dans, då solen skiner på oss så att våra fräknar tittar fram. För våra framtidsplaner som inte inkluderar pojkar, män, nötter och svin! För helande hjärtan, sommarbruna ben, flätade hår, sena sommarnätter. Vi riktar blicken framåt. ALDRIG bakåt. Vem är med mig?
Count me in!
T.O.M JAG